... just a rant slightly

I don’t really know exactly how I feel right now. The feeling that I have that is festering deep within my chest is more like a deep open wound. All I can truly ask myself is ‘what the fuck am I doin here?’ I jumped up on a limb to take a trip that I was completely unsure about in the first place. Then again I have to take into consideration my constant urge to doubt myself. Yet I always feel that my suspicions are confirmed by the actions of others. This leads me to a plethora of conclusions far too complex to express. Although I am not alone I feel completely alone. As is I have nowhere to go and as the years have progressed the people that I did have and considered friends have slowly but surely began to diminish. Each friend has moved on and built significantly stronger and more meaningful friendships with others. As for me, Instead of creating the same with others I am not. I am still the same little girl who wishes that her friends would at least pretend to play with her. Though she has begun and mended each connection between those friends she has proven to be insignificant to each cause. This leaves her casted aside for the predators at their own discretion. Alone… again. This mood has to pass soon right? I sure as hell hope so.